Demyx's Birthday Party
by Taliax
Summary: Demyx feels like he needs a birthday party. And it's not even his birthday. And he doesn't know a thing about throwing parties. Looks like Axel's going to have to help him out, but even his plans go awry. Crackfic.


**A/N: I wrote half of this a long time ago, but the ending was too terrible to think about posting. I found it today and decided to finally fix it up. It's still not as good as I'd like it to be, but it's pretty much a crackfic, so I took a little liberty with the characterization. And just about everything else.**

**Mr. Fluffykins is property of Lexicon, which was also from a story long ago.**

"Demyx, you can't throw yourself a birthday party," Axel said, rolling his eyes.

"Why not?" Demyx whined.

"First of all, it's not even your birthday. Second, what are you going to do? You don't even have a cake."

Demyx was too determined to carry out his plan to be put off by Axel's reasoning. "I'll get Zexy to bake me one."

"And you don't even have any decorations. Demyx, Demyx, Demyx," Axel shook his head in disappointment.

"Yes I do. I've got Mr. Fluffykins." Demyx said, holding up a black, writhing ball of fur.

"That's not a decoration. That's a cat." The, er, cat made a growling/squealing/dying noise, and Demyx dropped it. "At least I think it's a cat."

"He's a Heartless cat." Demyx said proudly. "And his name is Mr. Fluffykins."

_Mr. Fluffykins? Not even gonna ask. _"Well, you still can't have a party with just a cake and a... cat. Looks like I'll have to help you." _Well, this should be interesting. _

"Thanks, Flamesilocks!" Demyx squealed, hugging Axel, who held his arms up in surprise.

"Whatever... just stop calling me Flamesilocks. And the hugging."

_What in the name of Kingdom Hearts have I gotten myself into?_

XXX

In just an hour Axel had worked his magic- Demyx's room was full of lights and party decorations stolen and improvised from various parts of the castle, his bed having been corridored to the Hall of Empty Melodies for the time being. The light on the wall that read XIX (for Demyx's supposed age, 19) was actually made from parts of the signs above Marluxia's and Larxene's doors. Axel supposed he'd pay for that later, but it would be worth it for Demyx to actually see a real party. He even got most of the members to come. It would do them some good to stop with the whole work 24/7 gig.

"Xigbar, you got the food?" Axel asked as the eyepatched man entered the room.

"As if I'd forget, Flamesilocks. Got the drinks, too."

"Just as long as you didn't spike them."

Xigbar just laughed, unnerving Axel. He was probably just messing with him, but you could never be too careful with Xigbar. He'd get Zexion to give it a good sniff before anyone ate it.

"Hey, Saïx! You actually decide to have some fun for a change?" Axel asked, seeing the blue-haired Nobody watching from a corner of the room.

"Xemnas's orders. We don't want anything to get destroyed. Or incinerated." He glared at Axel, thinking of the last party the pyro had planned. There was a reason the Castle That Never Was no longer had a fifth floor.

"Don't worry. There's plenty of fire extinguishers, and I'm going to have Zexion make sure the food is safe."

Saïx made some sort of non-committal noise and went back to glaring at everyone like they should be working.

"Luxord! Got the games ready?" Axel called across the room.

Luxord gestured to a table full of chess boards and decks of cards. "Plenty."

Axel facepalmed. "This is DEMYX'S party. The only card game he knows is Go Fish, and I doubt his mind can even understand the basics of chess. Get, I dunno, Twister or something. Got it memorized?" When he thought about it later Twister seemed like the worst idea he could've come up with, but it was the only game he could imagine Demyx playing besides Candy Land.

Luxord sighed. "What kind of dull-witted simpleton can't play a simple game of chess?" But he left the room to go find some Demyx-friendly entertainment.

"The food is clean," Zexion reported. "But in the future I would not entrust food responsibilities to Xigbar."

"Good advice," Axel muttered, trying to recall why he had let Xigbar take the job in the first place.

Axel scanned the room, making sure everything was ready. Lexaeus was attempting to affix a party hat with a Nobody insignia on it (how those ended up in the back of the pantry, Axel had no idea) on top of his head. Xaldin yawned, sharpening one of his lances as he leaned against a wall. Zexion placed the last X atop the blue cake.

Xemnas, Vexen, Marluxia, and Larxene hadn't bothered showing up, which was probably a good thing. Axel guessed Roxas was still too much of a zombie for anything as strenuous as a birthday party.

Luxord finally returned with an old Twister mat and spinner, looking uncomfortable.

"Someone should clean out the basement," was all he said.

Xigbar laughed, dipping a chip in a bowl of cheese dip and eating it. "As if anyone would bother trying."

Axel agreed with that statement. There was a reason it was called The Basement That Doesn't Want to Be. "Looks like we're all good to go. I'll go get Demyx."

XXX

"Hey, no peeking," Axel reminded Demyx. "When is your birthday, anyway?"

"August 19. Did Zexy remember the blue icing?"

"Why did you decide to celebrate it in March?" Axel asked, ignoring the question.

Demyx shrugged, still trying to peek. "X-Face worked me to death on my birthday last year."

That was reasonable enough, for Demyx anyway. Axel stopped him from running into a wall and guided him into his room.

"You can look now," Axel said, and Demyx squealed like a fangirl.

"Happy Birthday, Demyx," The Organization members that were present said rather unenthusiastically, but Demyx didn't seem to notice it (or the fact that his bed was gone). His attention was occupied with one thing.

"TWISTER! Sweet!" Demyx called. "Who wants to play?"

XXX

Thirty minutes later, Demyx and Zexion were in their tenth epic game of Twister when Vexen decided to crash the party.

"Has anyone seen my experiment?" He asked.

The dreaded words made everyone freeze. Demyx and Zexion were both in awkward pretzel shapes at the moment that Vexen decided to ignore.

"What is it this time? Zombie apocalypse? Evil clones? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?" Axel asked, ready for the worst.

"Genetically modified fire-breathing Heartless cat. Highly unstable."

"Demyx... where did you get Mr. Fluffykins?" Axel asked.

"Mister? The cat-Heartless was female," said Vexen.

"See? It can't be Mr. Fluffykins!" Demyx whined, falling over and squishing Zexion. "Sorry."

Zexion struggled out from under Demyx, thinking that the other Nobody seriously needed to lay off the cake and candy.

At the sound of his name, the hybrid creature leapt from the top of one of Demyx's tall amplifiers, spring-boarded off of a very unamused Saïx's head, and landed in front of Demyx.

"Mrow," It meowed pointedly. Vexen tried to pick it up, but it bit his finger and leapt into Demyx's arms.

"He likes me more," Demyx said proudly, squealing when the Heartless-cat chomped down on his hand as well before jumping away and hiding under a pile of dirty laundry.

Vexen rubbed his hand. "Fine. Keep HER as a birthday present. Cats aren't good test subjects, anyway. Much too finicky." He grumbled and left, much to everyone's relief.

"I won Twister," Zexion declared, brushing himself off.

Demyx pouted. "No fair! I was distracted!"

Zexion snorted. "Too bad. I remain champion."

Lexaeus marked Zexion's tenth win on the scorepad. Demyx hadn't won once.

Axel clapped a hand down on Demyx's shoulder. "Let's keep it that way. Sorry man, but he's got you beat. And the rest of us are really tired of watching you lose to the castle midget."

Zexion sighed, rubbing his temples. "I'm not even the shortest anymore. Roxas and Xion can claim that proud achievement."

"Yeah, whatever." Axel waved a hand dismissively, grinning. "Anyway, let's do something more interesting."

What Axel considered interesting was also highly likely to be dangerous, so at that point Lexaeus, Zexion, Luxord, and Xaldin left, not even bothering with excuses.

"Heh, this should be entertaining." Xigbar adjusted his eyepatch, leaning back in one of the chairs Axel had brought in.

Saïx glared. "I hope you haven't planned anything likely to end in disaster." He couldn't count the number of times Axel had suggested doing 'something interesting' that resulted in mass destruction.

"It's not likely," the redhead replied vaguely.

"As if," Xigbar interrupted.

Axel shot him a look, at which Xigbar only grinned. "So, as long as Mr. Funsucking Bossyface over there doesn't object-" Saïx stared him down with the best 'you-will-regret-your-words' expression he could muster without feeling true anger, "-I'd say we should let the birthday boy make a wish."

_It is his birthday – birthday party – after all. We don't have any presents, so we might as well do _something_ nice. _And Demyx was one of the Organization members Axel was on better terms with. They were pretty close to friends, probably a step above acquaintances. Anyway, it would be fun to see what Demyx would wish for.

"A wish?" Demyx's face lit up in excitement.

"No free vacations," was all Saïx said.

Xigbar laughed. "So little Dem can have anything else he wants?"

"Permitted it does not cause destruction of any sort."

"So what's it gonna be?" Axel asked.

Demyx ruffled his mullet-mohawk, thinking. "Uh… Oh! I know!" He dug Mr./Ms. Fluffykins out from under the dirty clothes. "Saïx should pet Mr. Fluffykins, since he's a werewolf and all. He needs to learn to interact with other species."

Saïx banished the angry growl from his throat, as that was really not helping his anti-werewolf case, but left the menacing, bore-into-your-soul glare.

Axel and Xigbar burst out laughing. Sure, it was the dumbest wish Demyx could've possibly come up with, but it the look on Saïx's face was more than enough to make up for it.

"C'mon Sai, it's not going to kill you." Axel grinned.

"I wouldn't speak so soon. It is Vexen's experiment," Xigbar pointed out.

"Please?" Demyx made what he probably thought was a cute puppy face, but actually looked like a sad pufferfish.

Axel snickered at Saïx's look of disgust. "You really are a werewolf. I'm impressed, though, I thought you would've tried to eat Fluffykins by now."

"I am no more a werewolf than you are a phoenix." He took the cat and began stroking its shadowy fur, not flinching even when it scratched at his arms.

"Heh, that's too bad. Being reborn from ashes sounds cool," Axel commented.

Demyx d'awwed at the sight of Saïx and Mr./Ms. (he decided he'd be nice to the poor experiment and call it a 'Ms.') Fluffykins, and Xigbar chuckled.

"There. Take your creature." Saïx shoved the Heartless-cat into Demyx's arms and walked out the door, but Ms. Fluffykins clawed at Demyx and followed after the blue-haired Nobody. It sprang up Saïx's back, climbed to his head, and nested in his hair. "What in Kingdom Hearts-"

The other Nobodies laughed uncontrollably.

"I think he likes you, Moony."

"Heh, opposites do attract."

"Ms. Fluffykins, I thought you liked me best!"

Saïx gave them all a last death glare before leaving like nothing had happened, Ms. Fluffykins still tangled up in his hair.

"Well, you got your wish. Looks like this party's over." Xigbar gathered up as much food as he could before leaving as well. Only Axel stayed behind.

"Happy nineteenth. I'm gonna go to bed," Axel called over his shoulder as he left.

Demyx stood alone in the middle of his room, pouting over the loss of dear Ms. Fluffykins. Then he realized something very important.

"Hey, where's my bed?"

**A/N: Yeah, that was random.**

**Just so you know, the Demyx and Zexion playing Twister part was from the 358/2 Days manga. I didn't come up with that out of nowhere. ^^;**

**Reviews make me a happy authoress~ **


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